An Open Letter to Mark Zuckerberg

Hi Mark,

What’s up, Bitch? By the way, congrats for being the youngest billionaire, and the CEO of the 3rd highest valued company in US and making over 550 million friends. Hey, wait! They also include 250 million Farmers and Mafioso, 100 million disabled-accounts and 75 million fake (includes stray dogs n pets), out of which 50 million would be from India and rest 25 million are, perhaps, our neighbor’s contribution; thanks to Orkut’s decreasing popularity.

Good that you are coming up with an innovative and state-of-the-art technology Facebook Messaging (email) system as you discovered 4 billion messages getting sent each day. (What’s up with Groups? A big fail, eh?) Now we are sure the mails are going to be blocked half-way through, for your TERMS are going to be even longer! Longer than the 8189 paged Ayodhya Verdict, even a Federal Govt.’s rules and regulations. Do you also follow the terms set by you? Then why isn’t it possible to block you?

Well, it’s nice that with Facebook email, you are allowing attachments now. So, guys can send their masturbating videos to ladies they sex-texted before! Me? Sorry, I’ll still stick to Gmail for that. I do not wish anyone to see me while I am shagging away to glory. I need Privacy!

And then more blockages, more profiles disabled (but not deleted), new profiles added to Facebook and Voilà! Facebook’s counter shows 1 Billion profiles and soon to overtake population of China. Is this how you show the numbers to the whole world of Social Media?

Hey, I saw The Social Network. And my admiration and adulation for you knew no bounds after learning how you got this social-networking/dating site out basically! No wonder when you have disparaged your girlfriend and deceived your best friend, you will do very less to care about people’s privacy or their concerns.

Although your PRIVACY explanation is written in simple English, but your business rules are damn faulty! Do you test your privacy features at all? Automation, Manual…? Here are few nuggets and my observations on how you have been compromising your 500 million users’ privacy:

  • PandoraYelp, and Scribd. Now you added Instant Personalization options. But hey why did you forget to notify users on homepage when you ‘checked’ Places by default for them under Account Settings> Notifications?
  • Popular Applications/ ‘Apps’ on Facebook steal/transmit personal information.
  • Your application developers sell user information to data brokers for money.
  • Users set their Photo Album privacy to Friends Only (How am I so sure? Click ‘View Photos’ -> This content is currently unavailable) but if the wall is public one gets access to the published photos and to the entire album thereafter clicking ‘Back To Album’. WTF! Don’t you see the Ugly World of Morphing out there?
  • Those whose friend requests are “Awaiting Confirmation” can still have my personal posts/photos/photo-tags reflected on their feeds! How outrageous is that?

With so much of privacy breach stories, no wonder why this Halloween, people had been wearing your mask!

FaceMash?

Now, let’s speak about the DISABLED profiles, on who violated your Statement of Rights and Responsibilities, as per you:

  • Thanks to your Share button people could share profiles they need to Report Abuse, on their walls. So, your Pinoy devotees have done the needful to my maiden & ‘Authentic’ profile.
  • Why the hell can’t you give or send warnings before you disable a profile? Your automated response after two months of my appeal says,

Your account was disabled because your behavior on the site was identified as harassing or threatening to other people on Facebook. Prohibited behavior includes, but is not limited to:

• Sending friend requests to people you don’t know
• Soliciting others for dating or business purposes

Isn’t the reason ridiculous, Mark? For what effing good do you have these “Looking For” options in your Basic Info then!!! Looks like your principle-makers are only on Twitter!Here for options on Basic Info

  • Have you ever had a chance to see how pissed people are because you disable profiles for reasons unknown? If not, have a check at http://facebookdisabled.org who are also on Twitter and have been reaching out to victims to sign the petition against your totalitarian attitude. Also, http://getsatisfaction.com/facebook. Not just a handful of them, there are millions, even bloggers at NetworkedBlogs. You could check your own Petition groups and this topic. And some ridiculous reasons as mentioned in this topic as well. Oh yes, the previous topic is written by a lady if you thought only “Male” profiles fell prey!
  • You don’t have a mechanism to weigh the volume of data/IP content in each profile i.e. Photos, Albums, Videos, Links, Notes, Contacts etc. before disabling a profile? Why? You have an idea how agonizing it is to lose them & what a pain it is to upload them all over again!! And when friends are concerned, they think I have kicked them out from my list!

You know what man, I could go on, but I also have to mention about your “People You May Know” algorithms that usually pull out fake profiles with suggestive photos, which in turn invite one’s profile to be blocked again going by your Terms! You keep changing Facebook features every morning, without informing people what’s new on the site and let them accept whatever shit you offer! Do you know the recall of Publish Profile Picture feature on the wall has been a huge disappointment for users?

It’s an application and it would definitely have bugs. Do you just intimidate and block FRIEND REQUESTS or do you ever test your own application before letting it ‘Go-Live’? Did I just hear a deafening YES, then what’s this all about? And at times, when you post a comment, others don’t see it after sometime, makes one think he/she deleted it. Misunderstandings over FB now! WTF! Well, how many more times would you keep changing the useless SPAM filters for Amora/Anita/Astrology Predictions and all that shit app!

Although we’ve had a Quit Facebook Day on 31st May, 2010 fetching 37971 committed quitters, I understand it doesn’t make much difference to you, the ratio is just too less as compared to 500+ million active users, after all, right? But, keep your fingers crossed Mark, for this quitting no. would soon emulate your bragging FB figures.

You cannot do good to your users, the disabled and crippled profiles, all right, but if you could do this favor for the sake of mankind- PLEASE Unfriend Coal and keep the Planet Green and not make it Black instead. You’re CEO, Bitch! C’mon.

If you still cannot do any of these, then please change your name as suggested in the text editors.

text editor suggest

Many Thanks,
Facebook-turned-Twitter Addict

 

Image (Zuck’s Mask) Courtesy: Gawker

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40 comments on “An Open Letter to Mark Zuckerberg

  1. A very-well researched compilation..
    An informative piece as well when it comes to explaining the Privacy related flaws and other glitches in FB algorithm…

    Altogether an awesomely enjoyable and informative reading experience…

    Thanks for bringing the flaws into the open which otherwise am sure many wudnt have never known or otherwise ignored.

    Cheers to the Open-letter!!!

  2. I completely agree wit namrata, Most of these facts provided in the ‘The open letter’ r many times ignored, and they do lead to many misunderstandings, loved the article:) very wel written, had fun reading it, wel compiled… jus looooved it!!:)

  3. Dude….quite an analysis and compilation. Apart from that, i also loved the language and the raw tone being used. You know what impressed me most about your post…? The very first line. 🙂

    Though, i feel differently for him. I agree with the idea creation for FB and the ditching part and also the features you talk of. But, something still remains…and that something is the love for a coder…the love for someone who breaches…who sees…who questions…..who thinks…something in a way never thought of.

    Considering your contempt, which is understandable, i wont be surprised if my comment didn’t go well by you. I read your post. I appreciated what i found good and also commented the way i thought i should, in being true to me.

    Cheers !!!

    • Dude,
      Nice research, probably author can grab a product manager’s job in face-book. But tell me honestly; one website / web solution, which does not have flaws. I need to say software is always evolving. Remember windows 95, 98, xp, me, visat, 7.Days were there where hotmail was WoW!!.. But now its time for gmalil.

      We have to admit, from the day one when human being came to planet earth, they were never satisfied. And that’s good. That’s why we are humans, intelligent spices in earth. We started with dos , fortran, assembly, cobol, unix. Then we get the fine critics on those. That made us coming out from mainframe, dos, to linux, windows, android and what not.

      Critics are always friends. Give sometime to FB, it will hopefully evolve. You have to admire the amount of improvisation this company has shown in its small tenure. Do you remember you were saying WOW!! to this site sometime back (Nope!!! Don’t give me that s**t. Then how come this is one of the topmost company). Now it has concerns. So dude. That,s the nature of this industry. “You are best today / you think you are best today”. These are not the facts forever. Wait and watch, either facebook will evolve or they will be out of business.

      But I will definitely appreciate the effort, author has put in this research. Believe me you are the factors, which keeps technology evolving. You give us (technologist) problems and we are here to solve. Lets keep it going. All the best to FB and the Author.

      Cheers!!

      • @Sandip/Ashis: Glad U saved few cheers for me there. I should thank U guys for puttin in some good comments/feedback as well. Yeah, he is undoubtedly good, say, a guy who got to challenge Forbes Top 10 richest people, n into it almost…not a joke!

        So many people pass out from Harvard but how many have this kinda business skills? How many hav gotten into success so fast? Whizbang. Genius. Had been an admirer but not after my own profile was disabled unreasonably. I wrote this letter, cuz I did not expect him or FB to be the way it is.

        It is awesomely light, fast response-request, powerful (#1) people search engine n immensely customizable. As I hav mentioned in the post, no software application is 100% bug-free! Can’t be. But the bugs should not be “Bullish” and “Annoying”. And responses to users should not be automated everytime someone reaches out their support team for help.

  4. Really it’s good blog which exposed some remarkable bugs in FB App; and I was not aware of lots of them. I am quite sure that, Mark “Blood-Sucker” will be overwhelmed by this pinch to his mind.
    I really appreciate the way; you expressed your sentiment on disabling your account on FACEBOOK, the social network on which you were dying to publish stuffs on every single time. Couple of “PATS on your back “ .. Well Done Vish.

  5. yeah love him or hate him….he doesnt give a shit…he is a gazillion times richer than you and could buy a million trolls like you….get a life….plus, all the people who commented, if u have problems with it, why do u use it>?? double standards much???

    yeah so there is flaws stop using it..even if u do stop using it, a shitload of other people will get accounts and its all the same for the same for Mark,..the point is, its designed for people to have some social interaction…get it???

    • Yawwwwwn!!! 1st f all, learn to frame slangs in sentences properly. Dont just use GAL for the heck of it. Looks like the CEO has “bought” you to write this mindless piece. Lacks punch man!

      Do me a favor. Read my post once more with eyes wide open n then go light an agarbatti ASAP in front of his profile pic.

    • Thanks for kind words mate but then U havn’t gone through the pain of having your profile disabled when U had been on FB consistently since 2 years that even ur “Relationship Status” changed from “In A Relationship” to “Single” for FB addiction!

      I have gotten out of the agony of losing my data-laden personal profile which had some awesome collections (Notes/Links/Videos/Albums) n networked friends. I just did my bit to the CEO. Just a frakin letter on my blog mate. 🙂

  6. I agree, if you dont like the service, stop using it dont whine like a little child, you have free will! If you want your online content to be private then you really shouldn’t be on a social networking site!

  7. Too good a post really. Brings out the sucker’s flaws. After easing off my frustration over the melodramas Ekta Kapoor creates by writing an open letter to her, I was thinking over writing a letter to “Sucker-berg” soon….But now that you have done this I’m more than satisfied. 🙂
    Keep on the good work.

  8. ……now thats what I call a write-up fit to be published with the best….it does go a lil ovrboard at times but it sure has fire…has the facts in place and maintains its sauciness and hits Mark in places he didn’t know he could be hit.

    I wonder if you are gonna stop here Fishy – and yes, I look forward to what happens next 🙂

  9. What is most attractive in your blog is your passion. I have never seen you writing about something just for the sake of writing. Bravo my dear friend.

    I dont agree with other commenter’s view that you should stop using FB if you dont like it. Well, Men neither accept nor reject all systems,,,, Men work to change systems.

    As he said, what is the use of ‘Friend suggestions’ considering the disability attitude of FB? What about deleting your profile info when disabling the profile without a single notification?

    COME ON FACEBOOK, THIS LETTER IS NOT ABOUT BUGS OR TECHNICAL PROBLEMS BUT ABOUT SIMPLE COMMONSENSE.

    Recently I read that FB gives its employees the highest average salary in the world. Yes, money cant buy COMMONSENSE, its something you acquire by birth.

  10. It’s shear arrogance of the asshole. But he’ll fall one day and that will break him for sure.Yesterday it was orkut today its FB tomorrow it would be something else. Like people forgot Orkut; FB will meet its fate too. I would like to talk to zuckerberg then. The post is interesting and very well written. You hit the bulls eye with your arguments. FB is clearly fooling its users people will understand that soon .The way u have written more than anger I sense your disappointment in FB owners. Very expressive language. Super like!!

    • Gracias Manji. And frustrated cud be added as well.

      I read in an article in ‘The Economist’ 5 years back on how Google was intimidating n arrogant. Now, it’s being bullied by FB for Google’s fightin to retain its employees, quitting for Facebook. Need a say more:
      “How-so-ever good you may be, there’s always a better one”. 🙂

      • Sure as hell there always is!!! We know it today he will know it tomorrow…or may be later…but he will!!!

  11. hey hey hey… Lovin it! Wel except some ppl dat disagree here! Rest r catchin up wit ya vish:) wel… I jus cudn help myself:) read it again:):D i also liked many ppl,’s comments n nt to mention admiration towards ya:) awaitin ur next letter;) make it more powerful!! M nt missin dat one!

  12. Well, it’s good research (I didn’t know about the album photos going public on the wall). But it’s time we treated like just another website. And not a part of our life. There was life before Facebook you know. We give far too much importance to social networking.

  13. Dude! This one of the most stunning blogs I’ve seen. The whole arrangement, the colorful posts, its totally friendly and addictive, this one. The post was funny and many facts true, but as you marked in the end, I will be a Facebook addict for the times to come.

    The blog, Man, 10/10 for it!!

  14. Tweets mentioning @vishyvibes

    http://twitter.com/#!/ruudyroon/status/6615400116658176

  15. Pingback: My blog’s “2010 in review” by WordPress « ~~Biswajeet's Blog~~

  16. Very well written!

    It is disappointing to read the hate-comments, really. i bet most of the Indians have this tendency to follow the popular thing blindly, and having the ‘i-don’t-care’ attitude for the flaws until they become the victim of it. Hence, efforts like yours go unheard/unseen, but i do hope, time will change.
    Keep up the good work.

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